Elephant seals are surprisingly small. Not dissimilar in size to grey seals, only the biggest males are larger. Not as pretty as grey seals, and the pups can’t compete when it comes to being cute. I’d stopped to see some in the Año Nuevo State Park but the lady at the entrance told me I’d have to join a $7 tour, it would take 2 hours and all the day’s tours were already fully booked.

Her suggestion was that if I wanted to nip a little further south there was another spot that was more accessible, and I could see the elephant seals there. I admitted I was heading in a broadly southern direction and asked how far it was.

150 miles.

I got there around noon, a full carpark, hundreds of people stood gawking at a few dozen mounds of flab, flippers throwing sand into the air as the seals tried using it as sunblock.

I took more photographs of the birds above the beach than the seals on it.

The car was telling me it was doing 43mpg (By the end of the day, 44.5). It was also telling me I had under a quarter of a tank remaining. I stopped and went through the horrible nightmare known as filling a car in America.

Swipe your card or start filling and pay inside, the pump tells me. I swipe my card. Ok. Enter your zipcode. I can’t, I don’t have one. 000000 isn’t accepted.

I go for the pay inside option, put the nozzle into the car. The pump tells me to start filling. I press the trigger but nothing happens. I wait. Nothing happens.

I ask the guy at the next pump what I’m doing wrong. He tells me to do the things I’ve just tried then tells me to go in, pay in advance.

I walk in, get asked how much fuel I want. I point out that I’ve never filled the car before, don’t know how much it’ll need, just want to fill it up. She takes pity, takes my credit card, doesn’t charge it.

I fill up. 3/4 tank turns out to be 6 gallons. This pathetic imitation of a car didn’t even come with a fuel tank.

Inside she charges my card, tells me to next time just ask for $40 of fuel, then come back in for a refund on the rest.

America, where you have to overpay in advance for your fuel. America, where they don’t trust people to pay 70p/litre for petrol.

America has the world’s highest rate of incarceration. Having visited 11 US states I’ve found Americans to be congenitally selfish and uncaring at a societal level but extremely generous and friendly at an individual level. All Americans know their rights, they’re taught them repeatedly at school; they just never seem to similarly embrace their responsibilities. So things like the way fuel stations here treat their customers really convinces me that the incarceration rate is due to the barriers American society systemically erects that almost demand poor behaviour by so consistently expecting it.

That would explain the stop signs too. Americans know they have a right to drive down that street, but society doesn’t trust them to share it properly, guided by give way signs to assure free flowing traffic. Instead everybody is dragged down to a simplistic “Everybody stop. First one to stop gets to move first”. Americans aren’t idiots, they’re just taught to act that way.

Car full, I needed coffee. There are three places on the planet Earth in which it’s sensible to eat Mexican food: Mexico, Texas (Where Tex-Mex is better) and California. So when I stopped for coffee ten minutes after leaving the seals I also grabbed some jalapeno poppers and a couple of street tacos. Street tacos are like normal tacos but tiny.

Asking for a big mug of black coffee confuses Americans. They think “black coffee” means no sugar as well as no milk or cream, which to be fair the Germans also do.

The main confusion though comes from the American approach to coffee: if you empty your mug, they refill it. For hours. So a large mug is mostly superfluous. Just drink many small or medium cups of coffees and only pay for the first one.

This is an American tradition I’d happily see in the UK.

I’ve spent the day driving down a world renowned scenic road, one of the “must see” things on the continent and.. It’s ok. Sure, it’s pretty, and the birds are awesome, and at times the road goes winding through hills. The coastline has beaches and rocky bits and elephant seals.

It’s just.. nothing it does is better than anything I’ve already seen. Elephant seals aside, seen just on this trip.

I think the issue isnt the road. I think I’ve just been incredibly spoiled. This is a pretty road and – Americans incapable of driving aside – a lovely drive.

It’s also a long one. I was finishing my first coffee of the day before the sun rose but it still dropped below the horizon again before I reached Santa Barbara, the mountains behind the town going a lovely warm colour.

I needed a full meal still so followed the suggestion of the motel manager, found the place and parked up. At ten to seven I walked up to the door and read the sign: Closing today at 7pm.

I walked next door, found they only sold pizza.

Today’s drive was pretty much all I did all day, so nothing more to add. I only walked a couple of kilometres too.

Tonight’s hotel is just the other side of Santa Barbara, a cheap motel that nonetheless offers a decent bed and accessible internet. It’s larger than I expected, and the staff are friendly.